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Curiouser and Curiouser

by Darren Wood

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1.
Worshipping the idols that you seein on tv, forgetting what's happening in between you and me. Cut your ties, forget the lies that you were taught in school. Don't you know that you're too old now girl to play the fool? High off the sound. Lower into the ground. I won't be just another idiot full of wonder Now it's time to make a life for real beyond tv. Time to focus on the people between you and me. Don't you know that you're too old now to go back to school? Quit your whining; you'll be fine if you don't PLAY THE FOOL! Be careful what you pretend to be, because you are what you pretend to be...
2.
Just a Game 03:08
When I see you flaunt it then I know I want it and I know it's gonna taunt me because your body haunts me and I go. So I bring you flowers and we talk for hours but you but you got the power so I I cold water shower and I go. Here we go, another game and it is never, ever my turn. I'm getting tired of the replay but I'll never, ever learn. So we keep on dating and I know you're waiting but I can't help debating that I'm not fit for mating and I go. Here we go, another game and it is never, ever my turn. I'm getting tired of the replay but I'll never, ever learn.
3.
Supposedly 02:40
Supposedly, I am the one who's in control. Supposedly, you are the one to make me whole. Can't assume I'm right; I'm wrong. I must be short, 'cause I can't belong. Honestly, I don't believe in all the rules. Honestly, you don't believe I'm not a fool. Can't assume I'm right; I'm wrong. I must be short, 'cause I can't belong. And I don't know what to do. 'Cause I just don't have a clue. This is bad, bad for my health. I think I'll go, go kill myself.
4.
Make You See 02:39
I am sick of making all the moves. Why is it so hard to get to you? Do you want to be with me? Lady, I will make you see. Time is slipping through my fingertips. Lies are slipping through your pretty lips. Do you want to be with me? Lady, I will make you see. Tie me up with all your silky ropes. Die, relieve me of my silly hopes. Do you want to be with me? Lady, I will make you see.
5.
Jellybeans (free) 02:23
Well I'm hungry, but I don't want to eat. I want to taste the world from my eyebrows to my feet. But I ain't got no money to buy a banquet for a prince. So I will sit right here and my taste buds will convince me that Jellybeans, jellybeans. I love to eat my jellybeans. When I got the munchies and I don't know what it means I just eat my jellybeans. In the Middle East, people are killing in the name of the Lord. In Africa, people need foods that they can't afford. In my own homeland, the Red and the Blue are fighting a war. So I will sit right here and quit trying to figure out what all this is for because Jellybeans, jellybeans. All I need is my jellybeans. When I read the paper and I don't know what it means I just eat my jellybeans. We got: tutti frutti, cream soda, cappuccino, chocolate pudding, french vanilla, toasted marshmallow, bubble gum, cinnamon, top banana, tangerine, black licorice... Wait... Why do they even have black licorice? Yuck. I got a girl at home, and she is better than I'll ever be. She's got straight brown hair, perfect style, and a college degree. She's in touch with God, sweet like spring's first velvet rose. So I will sit right here, and wonder why I was the one she chose because Jellybeans, jellybeans. All I need is jellybeans. When she says 'I love you' and I don't know what it means I just eat my jellybeans. Jellybeans, jellybeans. I love to eat my jellybeans. When I see the world around me and I don't know what it means I just eat my jellybeans.
6.
Where I Stand (free) 03:46
When I was nine and you were ten we were the best of friends. We wished on the moon and prayed to the sun that summers would never end. We had long days and treehouse nights, bundled up against the cold. As we lay, we would talk about getting married one day when we grew old. But then you up and moved away; said your daddy had to take a job in a different state. I never saw your face again, but even after all this time, I think I'm still in love with my best friend. I thought my life was perfect way back when we'd spend the night out on your family's farm with the stars for blankets, the meadow for a bed, and your pillow was my arm. But then you up and moved away; said your daddy had to take a job in a different state. I never saw your face again, but even after all this time, I think I'm still in love with my best friend. As the years wore on, I never could get the little blonde girl out of my head. My memories are all I have left; you could be married or you could be dead. And so I wrote this silly song and I sent it out into the world. If you're out there, now you know where I stand, so come and find me baby girl.
7.
If it's not hip hop, I don't want it, I don't want it at all. (I don't want it. I don't want it at all). If there's no rap, if nobody gets capped, well then someone dropped the ball. (They dropped it, someone dropped the ball). I want to hear it in the club or in my Escalade with dubs, I'm gonna play it all over the place. (Aww yeah). If he's not black or Eminem, I don't want to hear his face. Gimme them beats, gimme big fat bass. Give me autotuner, the better the sooner. Gimme pimped out cars, give me gold and diamond grills. Tell me about how rich you are, about the girls you got: Nucka, put on some hip hop. Dancing to my music I can be indecent with a girl on the dance floor. (If I wanted to, if I wanted to, if I wanted to). Really, this ain't dancing. This is sex standing up with clothes on - nothing more. (So what's wrong with that, so what's wrong with that, so what's wrong with that). Don't give me that music that is too complicated for my mind to really enjoy. (What?) Put on some T-Pain, T.I., Jay-Z, Justin Bieber, Kanye West, or one of them boys. (Aww yeah, that's more like it.) Gimme them beats, gimme big fat bass. Give me autotuner, the better the sooner. Gimme pimped out cars, give me gold and diamond grills. Tell me about how rich you are, about the girls you got: Nucka, put on some hip hop. I don't know why everybody freaks out about a rap. It doesn't have to be quality - it could even sound like crap. You just spit out words that rhyme. You don't have to be that good. You don't gotta be a player. You don't gotta be from the hood. It's just another form of poetry. Look at me - it's easy! I'm a poet and I didn't know it. I'm rapping like Weezy. (Yo, what's this kid even saying? I dunno, he's got a guitar. What do you mean a guitar? I dunno, I make my music on computers. Oh, that's cool.) If it's not hip hop, I don't want it, I don't want it at all. (I don't want it. I don't want it at all). If there's no rap, if nobody gets capped, well then someone dropped the ball. (They dropped it, someone dropped the ball). I want to hear it in the club or in my escalade with dubs, I'm gonna play it all over the place. (Aww yeah). If he's not black or Eminem, I don't want to hear his face. Wait a minute... I have a better idea: Forget about them beats, forget about big fat bass. Forget about autotuner, the better the sooner. Get some drums and guitars. Get a bass and some mics. We're all gonna make bands together. It's gonna be cool, we're gonna make music. Let's all turn indie. Let's all turn indie. Let's all turn indie, for the betterment of mankind.
8.
Mustache Pleasure (free) 03:20
I weighed ninety-eight pounds, had pimples all around, broken records was all I would play. I had bad B.O. and all the girlies said 'no' I got rejected almost every day. But then, I grew a mustache... Now I bench two-fifty, got a six pack and it's nifty hitting parties almost every night. I sweat Acqua Di Gio and don't tell me because I know that keeping ladies off of me is a fight. Growing a mustache changed my life. It was the best decision of my life. Took away all of my troubles and strive, yeah growing a mustache changed my life. I worked a dead end job cleaning toilets for the mob that they call the U.S. Government. I had zero benefits and my brain was bored to bits; I was just barely scraping by with the rent. But then, I grew a mustache... So I got a call from Obama saying 'Hey, kid. Do you wanna serve a while in my cabinet?' Now I golf with Al Gore, got a penthouse by the shore and I fly my own private jet. Growing a mustache changed my life. It was the best decision of my life. Took away all of my troubles and strive, yeah growing a mustache changed my life. So the moral of the story is that life is hunky dory when you got a little facial hair. You can be real hip if you cover your lip and make it furry like a grizzly bear. So go, and grow a mustache... With all the strength you can muster you should grow a cookie duster. Grow it out until it looks like mine and you will soon see brother that your life will be another and every day will be sweet like wine.

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This is my first album. It's a work in progress.

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released February 21, 2012

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Darren Wood Provo, Utah

"Music should be fun and funny"
- Josiah Astle

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